Profile: Brad Nagle, Dear Agony Dad
Brad Nagle is a part-time manager for a logistics company, a part-time video editor and blogger, and a full-time dad. Originally from Johannesburg, he now resides in London with his partner and two sons, Logan (named after the Wolverine), 5, and Cole, 2. The Dad Website caught up with Brad, a.k.a. Dear Agony Dad, to discuss blogging, vlogging, and the ups and downs of fatherhood
Thanks for your time, mate. Tell us a bit more about Dear Agony Dad?
I started D.A.D. in July 2016 as I needed a creative output for myself as my days of composing and producing music were taking a backseat. (This video aside.) Initially, I just started making videos about my experiences of fatherhood and shortly after that was contacted by The Dad Network UK to become a vlogger for them. Recently The Dad Network joined forces with Warner Brothers so I’m really looking forward to working on exciting content for them. D.A.D. has had mixed reviews, mainly because I have a dark sense of humour and so when I joke about things like chloroform to help a kid sleep, or a shock collar to stop a kid from screaming, some people don’t know how to read it and think I’m being serious.
What does being a dad mean to you?
Longer nights and emptier bank accounts! All kidding aside, the kids push me to be a better man and more importantly a better father. I want to be the kind of dad they grow up to be proud of.
What has been the single biggest challenge of fatherhood for you?
It’s a continuous struggle of worrying about whether or not I’m doing a great job raising my kids. My main job here is to send fully functioning adults out into the world.
Do you have any advice for any blokes struggling with the whole dad thing?
You’re awesome, even if the world sometimes depicts you merely as a sperm donor! It’s tough, but it does get easier. It all goes by so quickly so make sure you’re present in those moments. You’ll never grow old regretting having shared those moments with your children.
Has your approach to fatherhood changed since the birth of your first-born?
Hypothetical fatherhood was amazing before my eldest was born. Then reality took a metaphorical dump on how I had thought things would be. I managed to get on top of it all. When our youngest was born, everything was more chilled and relaxed and that gave us the opportunity to enjoy the early years a lot more.
Having kids is like having your heart wondering around outside of your body.
How do you entertain your boys?
My boys believe I am a walking, talking, breathing climbing frame. I love rough-housing with them and equally, they love it. Especially when Logan pretends he’s Batman, Cole is Robin and I am the Joker, which is rather fitting as I really am the Joker in the house. I enjoy going to the cinema with my eldest, building train tracks and watching cartoons with the boys.
I feel more vulnerable these days. Having kids is like having your heart wondering around outside of your body.
How do you think the role of a father is perceived in society today?
There is a paradigm shift within parental duties these days. Fathers are working towards spending more time with their kids and Mothers are fighting for more equal rights and opportunity within the workplace. However, I still feel there is a stigma regarding fatherhood and that mothers are still seen as the ideal parent. I cannot tell you how many memes I see out there that focuses purely on motherhood rather than acknowledging that a father can have shared the same experiences.
What are five things your boys should know by the time they turn 18?
1. Be kind, even if someone is a douchebag.
2. Be generous, even if you haven’t much to give.
3. Be thankful, for the smallest of pleasures.
4. Be loving and never close yourself off to love.
5. Most importantly, be you!